Crawfish Pie

Went to a local skate park today with the old D40x and a 50mm lens that is apparently of the brand "Underground."  I came across the lens in a rando box last year and started using it with some filters.

 

Decided to throw it on a camera and see what I got.  Weirdly, it wasn't working at first, but after I messed with it a bit, the iris loosened up and it was able to produce some pretty fantastic images:

 

 

Honestly, this lens really nails the color of the sky and really gets the vibes of the Yashica "Red Special" FX-3 pics I took last year at a different park.

But You Can Never Leave

Man, eff the news.

Seriously.

What fresh Hell did we get into here? I have grown to despise social media these days, because it's mostly a never-ending doom scroll supermarket tabloid. It was bad enough with the rando crap on facebook, but now it is full of AI generated crap and so much nonsense it's not even funny.

I'll admit that I'm probably doing it wrong, what with only having one friend anymore, but you know. 

Twenty-Two

Someone I would like to consider a good friend said something to me about a mutual friend not understanding her struggles in life.

It actually hit pretty hard for me. I kind of answered her comment on a very practical level, but it occurred to me shortly after I hit send, that on a more personal level, I didn't really answer part of it.  Admittedly, that is a conversation to be had in person, but in short, it is hard to understand what someone is going through if they don't tell you about it.

This particular friend has told me a little bit of her story that she hasn't shared with this other friend, and it seems there was some contention between the two, and it was pertaining to one not knowing a part of the other person's story.

I had an experience the other day where I commented upon a recipe that was frequently made in my house as a child. Someone asked if my parents were paying for my therapy for preparing that for us to eat, but I couldn't bring myself to be annoyed because she didn't know about the time in my life in which we were so poor it wasn't even a joke. Like so poor that there were times where things like running water weren't a thing. Or the trips to the grocery store where I was handed a calculator and told that $25 was all the money we had for food for four people that week, and to say stop when we got to that number.

Why? Because I've never really shared that part of my life with too many people.  I am, in fact, pretty sure this is the first time I've recounted anything like that here. I suspect that my sister dying is the hardest thing I've written about in this space to date.

That was almost twenty-two years ago. Reading through that hit me really hard today. I'm pretty sure most of my current friends don't even know about that one. 

In The End It's Right

I had plans. I had the vague outline of an post laid out in my head, but I've since forgotten what it was ro be about.

Possibly digital fish or a pink unicorn.

Could have been shoes or ships or sealing wax.

Might have been a General.

Or cabbages and kings.

Kings...I think it had something to do with the State of the Union, but i don't remember. Something about wishing someone would admit to breaking it so we can go about fixing it.

But I really cannot remember. 

Break On Through To The Other Side

Several months ago I developed 4 rolls of film and hung them up in the office to dry.

In the intervening time, a great deal of things happened resulting in that room being a dangerous place to walk for several months.  I had some time over the weekend. I did some work in that room and got to the point where I could safely move about in there.  I cleared off the desk and started cutting and scanning film.

These rolls cover 4th of July both 2024 and 2025, my trip to Lake Michigan in 2024, Yellowwood State Forest in 2024 and a bit from 2025 and the Rushville Steam Engine show from 2025.

Here are a few of the scans.  They won't be labeled as to what is what, but I'll fill in the holes once the scanning is done.

 

There are a handful of pictures from at least 6 different days on 4 rolls.

Feel Like I Do

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I do what I want.

And She's Okay

I played a short game of TTR: New York with someone this evening.  It was her first time playing that one.  Honestly, she did fairly well.

 It was fun.  We'll probably do it again fairly soon.

Baby Since I've Been Loving You

Since I'm not used to skipping my early morning post at this point, I am doing this on my phone. From my bed. With a pink unicorn next to me. Because that is my life these days.

If You Decide You Should Go

So this is being grown up?

Lists.
Alarms.
Appointments.

Seriously. Being an adult kind of stinks. Or is it being an adult who lives with others? Living by myself I could just do whatever whenever. I could stay up all night reading whatever nonsense on the internet or playing video games without judgement. I could sleep wherever I want whenever I want.

These days it is all about alarms and lists and food prep.

Seriously.

is there an alarm? yes? no? will i wake up? will i sleep through it? feed the people. will they make their own junk food in the microwave? did i make decent food for them to microwave? do i need to make them decent food? do we need to go through the lists in the books and get the things done? did i feed myself? coffee? always. do i need to prepare lunches for the other people in my house? do i need to prepare dinners for the other people in my house? will the other people in my house do it on their own? ideally they don't want to. so i guess yes. do i have help? probably not. do i feed myself? chicken nuggets? pretty much every day. blah. where am i going today? store? work? both? work then store or store then work? do i want to go home? do i want to deal with whatever im walking home to? do i want to listen to everything and everyone? do i want to stay at work staring at the wall until i can no longer justify being there? come home and sleep? come home and write? come home and read? come home and play animal crossing? come home and stare at the wall? eat? shower? sleep? lather? rinse? repeat. what day is it? am i doing the same thing tomorrow?

That is basically a summary of what goes through my mind every day when I'm not working.

While I don't feel like that is a great way to live, I am at least existing. Whether people like it or not, I'm existing.

• Current Mood:   listless
• Current Music: Seven Bridges Road ~ Eagles

No One Told You When To Run, You Missed The Starting Gun

It's been a long time. A very long time since I've written anything of substance in this space. Today I'm going to try.

I wrote a post earlier about how I've been moving blog entries from place to place, site to site for years now. I've settled, for the time being, on Blogger. Mostly due to photos. But I digress.

As I was going through the posts from 2003, I got very involved with reading them. But more than that, I was trying to recapture my feelings from the time.

How it felt sitting at the family PC from 1whatever am when I got home from work until about 4:45am when I heard people starting to get up. That was usually my time to go to bed.  I haven't come across anything yet talking about the inordinate amounts of time I spent messing around in an IRC chat room created by fans of a webcomic that I was enjoying at the time. Because none of that happened yet.

A couple of days ago I put up a post about a camera in this space. Partly becasue I wanted the mood/music/location stuff for the blogger post, partly because, well, you know. Nostalgia.

Well nostalgia came and hit me pretty hard. I keep forgetting that LJ now has achievements? Because why not! A notification hit me really hard:

I'm not going to lie, I was shaken. More so when I clicked on it and discovered that this particular blog is going to be twenty-two on Wednesday. Come November, it will be twenty-two years since the last update.

I was googling myself earlier, wondering whether or not any of my blogs showed up (not if my name is properly formatted!), and I discovered one of the places that I do still show up. Which led me to here.

I read through the comments. I cried. It took me a while to get my head back to gether, and I decided that I needed to at least visit my old stomping grounds. I stopped by and visited an old friend, even if she doesn't know I'm still checking in on her. Sometimes that is the part that hurts the most.