Tuesday, September 8, 2026
Time
Monday, September 7, 2026
If You Ain't In A Hurry Then You Ought To Stop By
π§ Podify Wrapped
August 31–September 6, 2026
825 Plays. 84 Artists. 466 Songs. One Week. Absolutely No Adult Supervision.
This week began innocently enough.
It did not end innocently.
By the time the final play landed Sunday night, the Podify ecosystem had generated 825 plays from 84 artists, covering 466 unique artist/title combinations. The listening was dominated by three enormous gravitational bodies—The Warning, Led Zeppelin, and Pink Floyd—but the Shuffle Goblin repeatedly escaped their gravitational pull and wandered into territories including Glenn Miller, MC Hammer/Vanilla Ice, William Shatner, Ray Stevens, Tracy Byrd, Men Without Hats, and approximately every other musical neighborhood in existence.
And yes.
We need to talk about Watermelon Crawl.
π By the Numbers
| Statistic | Result |
|---|---|
| π΅ Total Plays | 825 |
| π€ Unique Artists | 84 |
| πΆ Unique Songs | 466 |
| πΏ Devices Used | 3 |
| π₯ Most Played Artist | The Warning — 147 |
| π₯ Most Played Song | “Time” — Pink Floyd — 10 |
| π “Train True” plays | 5 |
The three most-played artists accounted for 376 plays, or 45.6% of the entire week.
That's:
- The Warning — 147
- Led Zeppelin — 120
- Pink Floyd — 109
The Warning alone represented 17.8% of everything played this week.
So when we said earlier that The Warning was “still more or less in shuffle mode,” apparently the Shuffle Goblin interpreted that as:
“Excellent. Play The Warning 147 times.”
π Top Artists
1. The Warning — 147
The undisputed winner.
And what's particularly amusing is that this wasn't simply one giant intentional album session. The Warning kept surfacing throughout the week, alongside Zeppelin, Floyd, BΓC, Ningen Isu, and whatever other musical debris the Goblin happened to be throwing at the wall.
2. Led Zeppelin — 120
Zeppelin remains the reliable nuclear reactor powering the Podify grid.
Led Zeppelin Remasters alone contributed 81 plays.
That's not a supporting appearance.
That's an infrastructure project.
3. Pink Floyd — 109
Floyd quietly accumulated triple digits while everyone was busy watching The Warning and Zeppelin fight for supremacy.
4. Ningen Isu — 44
The Japanity continues its slow but extremely convincing conquest.
5. Robert Plant — 43
And here's the interesting part: Plant wasn't merely benefiting from Zeppelin's presence. 43 solo Plant plays is enough to establish a second Zeppelin-adjacent power center.
6. Blue Γyster Cult — 37
And, naturally, BΓC brought the transportation infrastructure with them.
7. Van Halen — 26
8. Frank Klepacki — 24
9. Jimmy Buffett — 22
10. Flogging Molly — 21
Gary Moore, John Mellencamp, David Gilmour, Eric Clapton, Aerosmith, AC/DC, Boston and Village People also managed to get substantial airtime.
Because apparently 84 artists weren't enough.
πΆ Top Songs
The champion:
π₯ “Time” — Pink Floyd — 10 plays
That song just kept coming back.
Other major repeat offenders:
- “Burnout” — The Warning — 6
- “Money [Explicit]” — Pink Floyd — 6
- “Houses Of The Holy” — Robert Plant — 6
- “Dull Knives (Cut Better)” — The Warning — 5
- “Wish You Were Here” — Pink Floyd — 5
- “Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love” (Live) — Van Halen — 5
- “Automatic Sun” — The Warning — 5
- “QuΓ© MΓ‘s Quieres” — The Warning — 5
- “Us and Them” — Pink Floyd — 5
And then:
π “Train True (Lennie's Song)” — BΓC — 4
plus one live version.
Five Train True appearances.
I would like to formally apologize to the Transportation Department for previously failing to notice that.
πΏ Album of the Week
There is actually a pretty clear hierarchy here.
π₯ Led Zeppelin — Led Zeppelin Remasters — 81 plays
That's almost 10% of the entire week's listening from one album.
Then:
- The Warning — Live from Auditorio Nacional, CDMX — 40
- Pink Floyd — Echoes: The Best of Pink Floyd — 39
- Robert Plant — Live From The Artists Den — 38
- The Warning — Queen of the Murder Scene — 33
- The Warning — Keep Me Fed — 32
- Ningen Isu — Live! Live!! — 29
- BΓC — 50th Anniversary Live – Third Night — 25
- Pink Floyd — 8-Tracks — 24
- Flogging Molly — Drunken Lullabies — 21
The Warning therefore had three albums in the top six.
The Podify Goblin has apparently developed a type.
π€― The Shuffle Goblin's Greatest Crime
We need to establish something very clearly.
“Watermelon Crawl” → “Ice Cream Man” remains undefeated.
The actual sequence was:
Jimmy Buffett — “Brown Eyed Girl” (Live)
→ MC Hammer/Vanilla Ice — “Go Ninja”
→ Ray Stevens — “The Streak”
→ Tracy Byrd — “Watermelon Crawl”
→ Van Halen — “Ice Cream Man” (Live)
→ Van Halen — “Rock and Roll” (Live)
→ Led Zeppelin — “Immigrant Song”
You stared at the iPod for two minutes after Watermelon Crawl → Ice Cream Man.
Correct response.
But then the Goblin apparently decided that wasn't enough.
He later produced the magnificent:
The Warning — “Hell You Call a Dream”
→ Tracy Byrd — “Watermelon Crawl”
→ Styx/REO Speedwagon — “Blue Collar Man”
→ Pirates of the Mississippi — “Too Much”
→ Blues Traveler — “Run-Around”
→ Aerosmith — “Same Old Song and Dance”
→ LMFAO — “Party Rock Anthem”
→ Van Halen — “Walk This Way”
→ Stealers Wheel — “Stuck in the Middle with You”
→ Pink Floyd — “Shine On You Crazy Diamond”
π Most Unhinged Run of the Week
That.
Especially because “Party Rock Anthem” → “Walk This Way” → “Stuck in the Middle with You” → “Shine On You Crazy Diamond” feels less like shuffle and more like a DJ having some sort of episode.
π The Transportation Award
This week wasn't merely a Train True week.
It was a Train True campaign.
“Train True” appeared:
- Aug. 31 — 11:10 PM
- Sept. 3 — 3:40 PM
- Sept. 4 — 7:37 PM
- Sept. 5 — 6:21 PM, live version
- Sept. 6 — 7:38 PM
Five appearances.
And I particularly enjoy that Sunday evening's sequence was:
The Warning → Train True → Pink Floyd → Led Zeppelin → MC Hammer/Vanilla Ice → Pink Floyd...
The Goblin apparently saw the word Train and thought:
“Yes. This belongs between Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin.”
Fair enough.
π―π΅ The Japanity Report
Ningen Isu: 44 plays.
That puts them at fourth place overall, ahead of BΓC, Van Halen, Frank Klepacki, Jimmy Buffett and Flogging Molly.
And Live! Live!! managed 29 plays.
At this point, I don't think “Japanity” should be considered an occasional feature of Podify Wrapped.
It's a permanent department.
π» The Radio / Live Department
This was another very live-heavy week.
Using obvious live/concert/broadcast-style indicators in the title and album metadata, roughly 40% of the week's plays are identifiable as live recordings or concert material.
That's a rough metadata-derived figure rather than a formal genre statistic, but it's enough to make the point:
Podify continues to prefer people playing music in front of other people.
The Warning CDMX, Robert Plant's Artists Den performance, Ningen Isu, BΓC's 50th Anniversary show, Gary Moore, Van Halen, Gilmour, Floyd, AC/DC, Flogging Molly and many others all contributed.
π Podify Awards
π₯ Most Played Artist
The Warning — 147
π₯ Most Played Song
Pink Floyd — “Time” — 10
π Most Disturbing Transition
Tracy Byrd — “Watermelon Crawl” → Van Halen — “Ice Cream Man”
Still undefeated.
π Most Unhinged Sequence
Hell You Call a Dream → Watermelon Crawl → Blue Collar Man → Too Much → Run-Around → Same Old Song and Dance → Party Rock Anthem → Walk This Way → Stuck in the Middle with You → Shine On You Crazy Diamond
This deserves its own plaque.
π Transportation Award
Blue Γyster Cult — “Train True” — 5 appearances
The trains were on time.
Repeatedly.
π―π΅ Japanity Award
Ningen Isu — 44 plays
π€ Shuffle Goblin Award
“Party Rock Anthem” → “Walk This Way” → “Stuck in the Middle with You” → “Shine On You Crazy Diamond.”
For services to absolutely nobody's expectations.
π Emotional Whiplash Award
“Watermelon Crawl” → “Ice Cream Man.”
I'm not going to overthink this one.
π¬ Final Verdict
825 plays.
That's a serious week.
But the more interesting number might be 466 unique artist/title combinations. The Podify machine was not simply hammering the same handful of albums all week. There was a tremendous amount of movement—and somehow, despite that, The Warning, Zeppelin and Floyd still managed to consume almost half the listening.
The week also demonstrated that the Shuffle Goblin has learned a dangerous new trick:
Musical foreshadowing.
He'll give you The Streak, then Watermelon Crawl, then Ice Cream Man, just to see whether you'll notice.
He'll give you Party Rock Anthem immediately before Walk This Way.
He'll insert Glenn Miller's “Pennsylvania 6-5000” into a sequence already containing BΓC.
And after all of that, he'll calmly play “Shine On You Crazy Diamond.”
Because apparently that's where we were going all along.
825 plays. 84 artists. 466 songs.
The Warning won. Zeppelin survived. Floyd refused to leave. Ningen Isu expanded the Japanity. The trains remained operational.
And somewhere in the darkness, the Shuffle Goblin is still whispering:
Watermelon Crawl… Ice Cream Man…
That was one hell of a week.
You'd Hit The Produce Aisle At The Super Walmart
I'm sitting in a Walmart for over an hour by myself today thinking about the things that have happened in the last couple of weeks. I was recently asked if I do my grocery shopping alone. I answered "Sometimes."
I should probably ask if there is something behind that.
Sunday, September 6, 2026
Cold As Ice
There have been many events recently, in the world, the nation, the state, my city that constantly remind me of a quote from one of my favorite books: “…nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change…” - Douglas Adams, So Long and Thanks for All the Fish
With that, why can’t we actually just not be shitty to one another? I was sitting in a church today with my family listening to the readings. The overwhelming theme of the readings today boiled down to “Love thy neighbor as you love yourself.” I cannot help but to look over in the bench and see someone that I happen to know for a fact is a racist bigot and I just sigh in exasperation, because that person thinks they are a legitimately good person.
Many things have happened locally this week. ICE has been very active in my city this last week. One of my best friends told me on Thursday that ICE took their dad earlier in the week. Yes, they released him later on in the day, but that doesn’t change the fact that they did it. My understanding of the situation based on what I’ve read is thus: A woman (the woman in question said this while being interviewed) that she noticed ICE following her as she pulled out of her driveway in a painter’s van. She stopped for gas. They saw my friend’s father and took him instead. Is there more to the story? Maybe so, maybe no. But that is my understanding.
So summary? Literally grabbed him off the street. No checks, no nothing. Hispanic? Yes. Legally here? Also yes. Presumed reason based on what I‘ve read? Looking Hispanic may have been enough. From what I read about the situation, they were actually following someone else in a painter’s van. She stopped somewhere, they saw him and decided to grab him. Based (presumably) on appearance alone.
Racial Profiling - A government or law enforcement activity that targets a suspect or group of suspects based solely on their race.
Again, is there more? Maybe so, maybe no. Imagine going to work and being followed based solely on what you are driving. Imagine (in this case) watching someone else get picked up after you stop, or even getting picked up yourself. Again, based on what you are driving. Just because your work vehicle puts you on someone’s radar. Why does a construction-oriented van do that? Statistics. And here's the part that really gets me: my friend's father wasn't driving a work van. He was trying to put gas in something like a blue sedan from a Korean manufacturer. You know, that thing that's a dime a dozen.
This grabbing people off the street based on how they look, well…That’s racial profiling to me. That bothers me. That bothers me a lot. My friend is here legally. Has a legal status of some sort, but is terrified to leave their home in order to do things like go to work, go to the grocery store, make sure their child is taken care of. I learned a lot this week. Among the things that I learned is that “there’s an app for that.” An app to show where ICE activity is.
As I said to my friend, “I love that there is an app and it is helpful, I hate that we live in a world where that app needs to exist.”
That doesn’t change the fact that my friend is scared to leave the house to live their life though. How does a country that purports “…liberty and justice for all!” end up in this situation? I realize that nothing about this country was ever perfect, and I realize that “liberty and justice for some” is what it always meant. I realize that we’ve made great progress getting closer to “for all” rather than “for some.” I understand that we still have a long way to go. I also think that there are too many people who think that our current capitalistic society and so called democratic government are stumbling blocks in that path. But are they really? Or is it just people (like myself, I’ll admit) that are sitting on the sidelines being silently outraged. I guess standing on the curb, filming and posting on social media in the hopes that their video will bring justice, or at least a clearer picture of events is at least attempting to do something.
Who is actually out here doing the work? Abbie Hoffman is gone. I don’t think there are many people these days in the mold of ‘60s and ‘70s activists that are willing to get their hands dirty? Typing into the void that is social media only goes so far. Even using ALL CAPS WHEN YOU TYPE ONLY GOES SO FAR, to be honest. I don’t know how the ICE protesting actually goes, but it SEEMS LIKE every time one of those makes the news, it ends up with some form of gun violence in the street. Sometimes the protesters are portrayed to be doing something foolish, other times not so much. I realize this is what the information age has morphed into…A constant stream of always on opinion pieces. I also understand that this is an opinion piece.
I hate that I am surrounded with people who think that immigration of all sorts, legal or otherwise, should be outlawed in all its forms.
I wish the system was much more fair to everyone. I wish that ICE wouldn’t just grab people off the street based on how they look. They should work within the actual rules set of the rest of the criminal justice system. Stop for an issue, check ID, run legit information, make a decision based on actual, established facts. Are there bad people that are crossing the borders? Yes. Do the good outweigh the bad? I’m going to venture to say also yes. But here’s the thing…We live in a world where the only things we hear about are the bad.
Why is that? Are there no good people coming to the country in a legal way? Are the good ones just quiet and not noteworthy? Are the bad ones only being used to push an agenda? My friend is a good person who appears to be here legally, so I know that part is true. My friend and their family appear to be quiet people who don’t want to make trouble. I don’t know. I wish there was a more modern and streamlined process for citizenship but I suspect that won’t even matter in the end if you still look like what they are looking for.
And that’s really the crux of it, isn’t it?
What you look like.
How does the phrase go? You can’t judge a book by looking at the cover?
I could keep going, but I probably shouldn’t. I will say that my political views tend to lean more toward center of the road common sense. Please keep the guns and drugs out of my neighborhood (without turning it into a race war). If you’re going to take my money in the form of taxes, please give me decent roads to drive on. But we can’t even do that.
Oh mommy
I ain't no commie
I'm just doing what I can to live the good all American...Way
It says right there in the constitution
It's really A ok to have a revolution
When the leaders that you choose
Really don't fit the shoes
But here we are. I’m not preaching revolution or overthrowing the government, but I would venture to say that the system needs an overhaul. Across the board.